Die Ghana pakkie storie - Deel 9

Kevin het toe egter nie gebel nie, lyk my hy bluf oor die bellery. Hy het egter bo verwagting goed presteer met die volgende email.

Kevin is ewe skielik vreeslik bedees:

Dear Chester Williams
Here is the ID of Emeka John Paul who the package will be deliver to his address and he will bring it to me to enable do as we plane and I am also using this opportunity to say sorry if you don’t like the words I use in the last mail to you so am very sorry

Mean while I will be waiting for your response as soon as you receive this ID and give it to them please get back to me and let me know when the package will arrive here in Ghana and please do not forget to give them the phone number I give to you which they will call as soon as the package arrive here in Ghana

Thanks and i am waiting
Regards
Mr. Kelvin

Hier is die pragtige ID wat hy aangeheg het: (Kliek op die ding om beter te kan sien)

Die aangehegte paspoort is ‘n groot wenner. Ek soek al lank so ‘n trofee. Sien, onder die anti-scammer brigade, is dit ‘n trofee soos min - ‘n regte, egte fake paspoort van ‘n scammer.

Die man se MS-Paint skills is beter as Chong Wong sin, moet ek sê, maar nie orde-grotes beter nie.

Kyk hoe oulik is John Paul Emeka se naampie daar in ge-“paste”, in ‘n heel ander font as die res van die goed, maar hy het vergeet om die naam onder-aan in die paspoort se geheime kode ook te dokter. So, daar staan die naam ewe - Ghaudunkwa, Daniel...

Arme ding, hy is regtig nie die skerpste potlood in die blikkie nie.

Chester is egter be-indruk, en die transaksie kan uiteindelik weer voortgaan.

Chester het mos kontakte wêreldwyd, en met die mooi egte paspoort kan hy net vorentoe boer.

In Ghana is daar ‘n hele paar vliegvelde, wat ek danksy Google opgespoor het. Een van hulle is Yendi, wat ongeveer 619 km van Accra af is. Die plan het al lankal begin vorm aanneem in my brein, toe ek so na die kaarte begin kyk om te sien waar Ghana nou eintlik was.

Fedex kan ongelukkig nie in Accra aflewer nie, hulle kan net Yendi toe vlieg, omdat die aflewering mos nou eintlik verkeerd was van die begin af. Ou Kelvin sal bietjie moeite moet doen om die pakkie te gaan haal.

Dear Kevin,

I appreciate the reverential change in attitude, it is healthy for our relationship.

Thank you very much for the passport, I have forwarded it to FedEx, and they were indeed happy with it. They will be shipping to Ghana immediately.

This time we have the address correct. It is Ghana, not Gambia, it is Ghana as you said in your email, and I confirmed again that they will be sending it to Ghana. So it is Ghana, not Gambia.

They have your number, and should be calling any time soon.
Now, have you found any quotes from local traffickers about how much they will pay for a Nokia N97? How much is it worth, and when will you pay the money into the Global Courier Services Account? I need to receive my package soon please.

I have been thinking about visiting Ghana soon. Maybe we can meet in a nice quiet detrimental place and talk some more business one day.

Anyway, I hope to hear from you soon.

May the force be with you.
Regards,
Chess

Ek praat van local traffickers, soos in "drug traffickers", en hy lig nie eens ‘n halwe wenkbrou nie.

Sinonieme vir woorde wat ek gebruik het:

Reverential - respectful

Detrimental - harmful, damaging, disadvantageous, unfavourable
“Maybe we can meet in a nice quiet detrimental place...”

“May the force be with you?” Hierdie ou kyk obviously net iAfrika TV, hyt gin idee nie.

Inteendeel, Chester het nou die man se hartsnare geroer:

Dear Chester Williams

Thanks for your mail to me and am once again apologize for the mail I sent to you which you are not much happy about so please forgive and forget Mean while I have not ask how much they are selling the phone here but all know is that any amount the prize is here it must rich to pay the charge to Global Company to enable them deliver your package to you because the phone is expensive phone so don’t worry about that I will make sure I sell it the amount that will rich to pay for the delivering of your package

Regards what you said about visiting Ghana I will be very happy if you can do so because I have a friend who is a Banker and he is looking for a good trusted foreign partner that he can do business with a very large of amount and when you come I will introduce you to him so that he can do the transaction with you because I have the trust in you and I will guarantee him in that you are a nice person so no problem about that

Thanks and I will let you know as soon as the phones arrive here in Ghana and Fedex company call to come and collect it
Thanks and I am waiting to here from you as soon as you receive this mail about the business I talk about with my friend who work in a Bank here

Regards
Mr. Kelvin

Oh yes! A new business partner! Asseblief meneer.

Nou begin dinge lekker raak. Ons is nou klaar met die speletjies, hier kom nou groot besigheid.

Ek het geweet hierdie ou gaan oorstelp wees van vreugde as hy hoor dat ek wil kom kuier. Dan kan hulle vir Chester hostage hou, rape, vermoor en al wat 'n lekker ding is. Daar was so tyd terug 'n dom Aussie wat so gevang is toe hy Nigeria toe gaan. Hy land daar met sy aktetassie om die "groot geld deal" te doen, toe druk die manne hom in 'n kar se boot en hy sukkel 4 maande lank om weer uit die land uit te kom.

Ek het Kelvin se hartsnare geroer, en die vreeslike apology is tog te pragtig. Nou is dit tyd vir groot besigheid.

Maar eers moet ek die pakkie reroute na ‘n useless klein dorpie in Ghana met die naam van Yendi.

Dear Kelvin,

There is good news, and there is bad news. The good news is that the package has arrived in Ghana. The bad news is that it was taken to another city close to you, the place is called Yendi.

They tell me it is not too far away from Accra.

Apparently there is some problem to deliver to Accra, something went wrong with the aeroplane, and it had to land on the airstrip at Yendi.

Fortunately it is very close to Accra, so maybe if you would take a taxi and go and fetch it there, it would save some time. Otherwise we have to wait for next month’s flight from Yendi to Accra.

I am very angry at these FedEx people, they have really messed this up in an insanitary way. So please just commandeer a train, ferry or bus to Yendi and go and get the package there if you please. I am sorry about this premeditated error.

I will write to you soon about some other business, I just need to handle a few meetings with my concubine and the despot.

Will be in touch soon.

Regards,
Chester
Greetings

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